Sunday, April 6, 2014

Childhood Restored

The Redhead was nearing nine when we started plotting and planning our move from The Midwest to the West Coast.  In our Kansas backyard, she had a wooden play structure, the kind with a playhouse attached, swings, and her favorite, an acrobat's bar with rings.  We have hundreds of photos of her playing on it, climbing on top, doing stunts, and putting on circus acts for us to enjoy.  And she was nearing nine, and we thought it made perfect sense that not only were we leaving it behind for our tenant, we wouldn't be replacing it in California.  What was the point?  She was nine.  She wouldn't have many more years of swing set usage.



Folks, that's exactly why she needed a swing set.  Because she doesn't have many years left.  We unintentionally were robbing her of childhood play.  We didn't realize it.  Every now and then, I'd have the fleeting thought, but I'd ignore it and deem it as frivolous.  But we got rid of her train table, her massive kitchen set, tons of toys, and all of her backyard play equipment.  We justified it because of the move and the fact she had too many toys to begin with.  We justified it by her age.  But what we forgot to do was be grateful that we still have these few years left of her childhood.  We took for granted our little girl who wants to still play like this.  We still have an active child who likes playing outdoors.  Who likes swinging upside down like a circus monkey.  Who likes serving her plush husky meals.  She isn't afraid to be little.  She likes being young.  She loves being her.  We took her for granted.



We lucked out with the sandbox last month, the one we found on the curb and turned into a Ninja Turtle.  And just today, Mister Man built this swing set.  It's nothing quite like her former one, but it has her favorite piece, and it's exactly what she wanted.  It's eight foot tall, so it's tall enough for her acrobatics and it's structured a lot more securely than a metal one.  And between that and her sandbox, it will buy us some time as we start to work on turning the little wooden shed into a playhouse.  We probably don't have a lot of years left of use.  But we do have a petite little nine year old.  One that is worthy of such things.  And even if she's done with these toys in a year, they will be well worth their efforts.




Because we simply as parents need to enjoy as much of their childhood as possible and make sure they enjoy as much of it as well.  They're only little once, after all.  And some kids age rather quickly.  Whether ours does or doesn't, we need to cherish every blessed little moment we have with her.  We need to encourage her to be active, rather than tell her she's too big for things.  Or justify the fact we moved and base it on her age or time.  We don't want her thinking we cared more about the move than about her and her belongings and playtime.  We're not following our former ideologies, the ones I held so dear.  Including the one where we wanted to avoid aging her and pushing her into tween interests.  We weren't supporting her like we used to.  From the parents who made sure she had the best of toys.  Not every toy, but a range of toys- the best ones that would last for years to come.  We didn't care if anyone thought we were overdoing it, because we aimed for no regrets once she was grown.  We bought a well-rounded selection of toys for her, based on her interests.  We encouraged her in every aspect we thought we could.  And we continued to do so.  And then suddenly, we lost our way while moving, making excuses and considering ourselves as sensible.




It's time to restore childhood.  We can't give her everything back, nor should we.  But we need to be more understanding and encouraging again.  Like we used to be.  Instead of shrugging and stating her age, we should be finding new and innovative ways to encourage playtime.  She's still our active little girl.  And we should be grateful for that.  Whether she's five, nine, or seventeen.  Whether we're moving or not.  She's nine.  And instead of punishing her for it, we need to savor it.  Because we'll miss all of this in a decade.  Or even less.  And we should be embracing our former no regrets policy.  We need to remember the parents we always have been.  Surely, we didn't forget to pack them.

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